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Years after his nearly forgotten tenure at the prison, the young therapist went on to become a well-respected author and psychologist with a thriving private practice. One day, he received a phone call from a gentleman who urgently wished to see him. An appointment was set.
The following week, the psychologist welcomed a middle-aged man into his office. He was clean cut, immaculately dressed, well mannered and polite.
"What can I do for you?" inquired the doctor.
"I had to come and thank you," said the man.
"I'm sorry, I don't recall . . . " said the doctor hesitantly. "Have we met?"
The man smiled. "Many years ago, you gave me some tests and spent a few sessions counselling with me."
The doctor still could not remember.
"I was in prison, and what you said to me changed my life."
The doctor was impressed with himself. What words of wisdom had he offered this young man that had so profoundly and dramatically altered his behaviour and attitude? "Please go on," he urged the man.
"You said five words to me which I shall never forget."
The doctor waited. Perhaps he could use this technique on someone else.
"You said, 'You have a high I.Q.' "
The doctor was deflated, and speechless.
The man went on. "I left your office and I thought, 'If I have a high I.Q., then I can do anything I want.' I immediately enrolled in courses at the prison and, during my incarceration, worked my way through elementary, secondary and finally university level courses. When I was released, I got myself a job and worked my way up in the company. Today I am married, have two children and am a manager. I own a home and a car, and am a very happy man."
All of his life, this man had been told he was a good-for-nothing nobody. He had believed the words others had told him and had lived up to the expectations others had placed on him. That is how he had ended up in prison.
Fortunately, he also believed the words of the psychologist. Taking them to heart, he changed his life.
Throughout history, people now famous tell of the negative words others spoke to them in their early years. Louisa May Alcott, the author of Little Women, was encouraged to find work as a servant or seamstress by her family. Beethoven handled the violin awkwardly and preferred playing his own compositions instead of improving his technique; his teacher called him hopeless as a composer. Albert Einstein's teacher described him as "mentally slow, unsociable and adrift forever in his foolish dreams". He was expelled.
Words. We often don't realize the tremendous power they have for good and for bad. We can so discourage others that they feel their lives are worthless. While many hold within them tremendous potential, this potential is often left untapped as they spend year after year locked in prison, trapped by their belief in the discouraging words of others.
The Bible calls Jesus Christ "the Word". What a powerful metaphor for us! As Christians in a world of discouraged people, may we always be aware that our words are tools that can transform lives for Him.
Donna Stirling is a freelance writer in Mississauga, Ont. This article was originally published in The Insider, published by Prison Fellowship Canada.
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