Teach a child to pray
Marlene Kropf
A recent series in our local newspaper recounted stories of children's experiences of God. In one story, a 10-year-old latchkey child in a poor and violent city told of hearing God speak to him each time he opened the door to his house after school: "You don't have to be scared. Nothing's going to happen to you."
This story reveals the capacity of children to be aware of God's presence, and to speak and listen to God in prayer. The story of the child Samuel in I Samuel 3 confirms that God speaks to children and can be known and understood by them.
Parents, grandparents and teachers are sometimes puzzled, however, about how to teach children to pray. What are the best ways to introduce children to God? How can we create an environment in which prayer is a normal part of everyday life?
Become praying parents
Without a doubt, the most important way we teach children to pray is by becoming people of prayer ourselves. Parents or teachers who lead meaningful mealtime prayers or who pray a prayer of blessing for a child provide a model for prayer. By using ordinary language and speaking to God about immediate concerns, they teach children that God is approachable and cares about what happens to us.
Bedtime prayers
The tried and true prayer ritual for children is a bedtime prayer. Once, when I spent a week in a Mennonite high school, I interviewed students about their prayer practices. Nearly all the teenagers told me that they still pray a bedtime prayer just before falling asleep. The habit they learned as small children is so powerful that it remains a fixed part of their daily routine.
Teaching a three or four-year-old to memorize a prayer is a good way to begin. Before long, though, children should be encouraged to speak their own words to God. At first, a parent can guide a child's prayer by suggesting: "What good things happened to you today? Let's thank God for them." (Then pause for the child to pray.) "Did anything sad happen today? Do you want to talk to God about it?" (Again leave space for the child's prayer.) "Do you want to pray for anyone tonight--grandparents, cousins, friends, pastor, teacher? Or for anything that is happening in the world?"
Listening to God
Though speaking to God is important, children also need to be taught how to listen to God. After they hear a Bible story, children may be asked, "What do you think God is telling you in this story?" When adults take a child for a walk in the woods or along a river, they can encourage children to recognize God's presence in the beauty and diversity of the natural world. Children may also be introduced to the peacefulness of meeting God in silence.
Praying with the body
Because children learn through their senses, they will pray best if their bodies are involved in prayer. Very young children can be taught simple hand movements to accompany a bedtime prayer. Older children can experiment with various postures for prayer.
The small group of which I am a part always ends our weekly gathering with the Lord's Prayer. We stand in a circle, hands joined, and pray together using a set of movements we have learned. Each week, the one-year-old who plays at our feet during the meeting joins us during the Lord's Prayer. He stands in the middle of the circle and watches intently while we pray. I believe he is also learning to pray.
Singing a prayer
One of the easiest modes of prayer is singing. Children can sing a mealtime prayer or bedtime prayer and also learn to participate in intercessory prayer by singing a response.
Unanswered prayer
The most difficult part of teaching children to pray is dealing with unanswered prayer. We will help our children with this thorny issue if we teach them that prayer is much more than petition. Prayer is primarily a relationship with God--a way for us to love God and to know God's love. God is like a caring parent or grandparent who always welcomes our prayers, but because we are always children in God's sight, we must trust God to know and do what is best.
Marlene Kropf serves as minister of worship and spirituality for the Mennonite Church Board of Congregational Ministries and teaches spiritual formation and worship at Associated Mennonite Biblical Seminary in Elkhart, Ind. This article is reprinted, with permission, from The Mennonite.
Return to the M.B.Herald Vol. 37, No. 3 Home Page