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Some of us have been in love, working at love, expressing love, sharing love and teaching about love for many years--and yet we often feel like we are beginners regarding love.
I recently spent some time looking through the stories of Jesus in the Bible for the word Alove@, wondering how it was used. Here is what I found.
1. The Bible calls us to love God completely. A man asked Jesus what was the most important rule for life. Jesus replied: ALove the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind@ (Matthew 22:37,38). I am convinced that as we learn to love God with all our heart, soul and mind, there will be a greater intensity in our love toward others, even toward those who are very difficult to love. Wholehearted love is a powerful change agent. If we love only to be loved in return, we will often be disappointed. However, when we love with abandonment, we change, and others around us also begin to change.
2. The Bible calls us to love even our enemies. Jesus said, ALove your enemies and pray for those who persecute you@ (Matthew 5:44). Obviously, the kind of love called for here is seldom possible outside of a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. It takes supernatural love to love those who choose to make our lives miserable. However, genuine love, God's love flowing through us, has turned many an enemy into a friend.
3. The term Alove@ is also used in a number of ways not recommended by Jesus. For example, Jesus warned us not to be like hypocrites, who Alove to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men@, Alove the place of honour at banquets@ and Alove to be greeted in the marketplaces@ (Matthew 6:5, 23:6-7). Our love is not to be focussed on ourselves or on what makes us look good in the eyes of others. True love is love focussed on others. As we love others, we are immeasurably blessed ourselves. The question should not be "Am I being loved? but "Am I a loving person who is daily making a difference in the life of someone else?"
4. Jesus presents a clear pattern for love: "As the Father (God) has loved Me, so have I loved you. . . . Love each other as I have loved you" (John 15:9, 12). God's love flows through Jesus Christ to us, and this love is the source of real joy in our lives.
Often we think love is a fuzzy feeling in our heart. People say they just "fell in love." But there is a structure to the kind of love that comes from God. In fact, Jesus implies that love has moral direction: "If you obey My commands, you will remain in My love" (John 15:10).
The teachings of Jesus give shape and direction to love. Whom should we love? How should we love? What is love? When should we love? These are all covered in the teachings of Jesus Christ. As we follow Jesus' teaching, we will have Jesus' love--a love that can flow through us toward others.
For some, giving and receiving love has been their greatest source of joy and fullfillment. For others, the very term brings thoughts of betrayal, remorse and loss. I am an eternal optimist. I believe healthy and fulfilling love can be rekindled when we accept love from Jesus Christ and learn to love Him in return. If you have "loved and lost," begin again. God's love changes things.
Carlin Weinhauer is senior pastor at Willingdon Church in Burnaby, B.C.
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